Player Encyclopedia: Future Phenom, Present Prodigy, Historic Hotshot

Image via National Geographic

Look at that concentration.

Future Phenom: We knew it from the moment we laid my bleary eyes on you -- bleary, because of the 2 am wake-up we endured to watch the proceedings of Japan/Korea 2002 live -- but oh how you made it worth it...those free kicks (you remember, the one against England?)...that goofy smile...you made it all look so easy...sure the people at PSG warned us about your late nights, but you had such joy and innocence that we were wont to believe it...and plus everything started out so well at Barca.

Present Prodigy: Some people may question your listing here, especially in this "what have you done for me lately industy," but you were FIFA World Player of the Year...twice (in 2004 and 2005)...and even when all of those dumb commentators were talking up ol' golden balls and his free kicks (seriously, the man's pretty, but he ain't got skillz like you), you were leading Brazil to their second Confederations Cup title in 2005, while helping Barca to back-to-back La Liga titles and the Champions League crown in 2006...but then you got lazy, unmotivated and, well, a bit more than pleasantly plump (granted not to the "fat f%$!" level of Ronaldo, but still)...and they turned on you at the Nou Camp and you became a shadow of your old self with a reputation tanking faster than Emmanuel Ungaro's since they've signed Lindsay Lohan as an "Artistic Advisor."

Historic Hotshot (?): TBD - New chapter, new place? Here's hoping to another club giving you another chance because things aren't working so well at Milan. Let's be honest you could do with another "new lease on life"; you've never linked up well with Pato and Leonardo isn't exactly you're biggest fan. I'm gonna take a wait and see approach with you, and pray that you don't waste your talents like some other wayward compatriots (Corinthians *cough* Ronaldo *cough*)...I mean it would only really take you actually showing up (physically and mentally, that is) to redeem yourself, but that's all part of your master plan, right? Because you obvi learned, when you went all Hollywood, that everybody loves a good comeback.